I was hanging with my posse this past Saturday. That is my Womyn's Group:) We were talking about GMO's and Roundup and the poisoning of Mother Earth. I was on my soapbox (one of many) and ranting and raving. Then one of the women said (paraphrasing), "We need to heal those wounds in ourselves to heal Mother Earth." Of course!! It was a ton of bricks falling on my head. And let's face it, I often seem to need those ton of bricks to see the message!
The message was...what poison do we need to purge from our bodies? This message had been coming at me from a few directions lately, but it took this beautiful woman to deliver it in her beautiful words for me to be able to hear it. This message had also been coming in other levels and layers of truth for the past month. I believe it started with my allergic reaction rash. I purged the toxins of early childhood abuse with the ravaging course of the rash. I received this message last week when I watched Eve Ensler's poignant Ted Talk titled Suddenly, My Body. In it she discussed her body and cancer and how having cancer helped her reconnect to her body. Eve also spoke about how she came to realize that her body was a mirror image of Mother Earth in that her cancer was symbolic of the poisoning of Mother Earth. I have left out a great deal of her talk and highly recommend you watch it. This is the link: http://www.ted.com/talks/eve_ensler.html. Now it was time for me to take a hard look at how I was poisoning myself.
The answer couldn't be any clearer. I have been poisoning myself with toxic, negative self-talk. I have found myself saying, "You are so stupid no one will want to hire you," "You are boring," "You are not enough for anyone or anything," "You are selfish and needy," "You are lazy!" Whew! I got a headache just typing those comments! But, now is the time to let go of all of that for good.
I am also reminded of some amazing words that Marianne Williamson strung together: "Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small doesn't serve the world. There's nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we're liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others." Wow! Truth in poetic form is a beautiful thing!
My prayers go out to all those effected by Hurricane Sandy as well as all people in need. And I vow to purge myself of anything that makes me feel small. Perhaps, in this way, I will heal myself and send healing out to the world. Won't you join me?
